stop unfollowing me I’m pregnant with your child
The tweet that saved the entire female population
voldemort calls harry ‘weak’ while he literally cannot kill a frickin 15 yr old boy. i could kill a 15 yr old boy.
Ahora todo tiene sentido
Oh my god it got better
This just kept going
i love it when people compliment my pets
She looks pretty dead
The best super power ever has to be the power to refill things. Think about it, your glass is empty, refill it without getting up. Your bank account empty, power to refill it. Your bed is empty of a person of your preferred gender, refill it and have some fun.
At first I was all:
Well that’s the stupidest thing I ever heard.
But then I was all like:
GENIUS! PURE UNADULTERATED GENIUS!
person annoying you?
refill their bladder
are you going to tell me you got 2 grams for 40 dollars next?
dying at me neither
Leonardo DiCaprio’s Filmography So Far
SOMEBODY IS PLAYING A PIANO AND IT’S MIDNIGHT HERE WHY
UPDATE: I FIGURED OUT THEY’RE PLAYING “MY HEART WILL GO ON”
UPDATE: I JUST OPENED MY DOOR AND YELLED “JACK” THE MUSIC STOPPED AND I CAN HEAR SOMEBODY RUNNING DOWN THE HALL ABOVE ME SHOUTING “ROSE” OMG
CAN I SHIP IT
No, itll sink
Ellen should win an Oscar for being Ellen
"and the oscar for best ellen degeneres goes to…. ellen degeneres"
"And the oscar for best Leonardo Dicaprio goes to … Ellen Degeneres"
So I accidentally said, “my crotch has a hole in it.” Instead of “my pants have a hole in them.” And this guy looked me dead in the eyes and whispered
"It’s called a vagina."
everyone has that one bra that makes everything okay
even the boys?
We have that one brah that makes everything okay
Of course Brad Pitt helped hand out plates and napkins. Dude’s got 47 kids.